Fake Starcraft II News

General Spoon · 09-08-2008, 01:08 AM

Inspired by my fake new thor concept (below) I have decided to create a thread in which I will post fake Starcraft II news as we wait for Starcraft II to be released. I hope that this humor will make some of you happy. Feel free to comment.
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Blizzard announces new Thor concept!
9-6-08

In a press conference earlier today, a Blizzard representitive was quoted saying:

Quote:

Thor will be built from the factory, once you have the prerequisite structure. We've finally worked that out. Basically, Thor is going to be a gigantic supply depot that provides 16 supply, walks, has guns and AA missiles, can submerge like normal supply depots, has to be killed once to get rid of its movement, and then killed again to finish it, SCVs can repair them back to being able to move, and can use those gigantic supply depot fans to fly across certain terrain features, like cliffs and water. While we still have balancing to do with the exact numbers, we believe that we have finally found Thor's niche, and are finished with him.

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New Zerg unit; Omegalisk
9-7-08

Today Blizzard released some concept art for a new zerg unit, the Omegalisk. Karune was quoted as saying:

Quote:

The tentacles were fun to watch while skewing marines

http://www.sonsofthestorm.com/viewer...arcraft&art=38

http://starfeeder.gameriot.com/blogs...sion-upcoming/

General Spoon · 09-08-2008, 02:15 AM

High Templar gets new ability; Psi Storm scrapped
9-7-08

A Blizzard Rep stated the following earlier today.

Quote:

After a good deal of beta testing, we have decided to replace the Protoss High Templar's old Psi Storm ability. We were initally going have High Templar keep Psi Storm, until we tried out a beta version where Psi Storm was replaced with Throw Rock as a joke. Throw Rock uses a small amount of energy, and allows a High Templar to pick up a rock and throw it at an enemy. This causes the floating text saying "wtf" to appear above the targeted unit. We quickly realized that the Throw Rock ability was more preferable to the Psi Storm ability. Throw Rock is such a great ability, that Psi Storm won't even be missed.

yuqingeng · 09-08-2008, 06:41 PM

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General Spoon · 09-08-2008, 11:22 PM

Monday, September 8th, 2008 A.D

4kids Buys Rights to Starcraft

Today a groundbreaking deal was struck between Blizzard Entertainment and 4kids Entertainment. 4kids Entertainment bought the rights to Starcraft for, as one Blizzard employee put it, "A whole bunch of Oreos."

When asked what they planned to do with the rights to Starcraft, a representative for 4kids Entertainment said, "We plan on finishing Starcraft II. We plan on replacing all the orchestral music with rap and hip-hop. Then we will select only the most inappropriate voices for each character and unit. Next, we will drastically gut and replace vital plot points, game balance, and racial traits. Finally, we will take all of these elements and dress them up in the interests of being kid friendly."

General Spoon · 09-19-2008, 12:02 AM

New idea. Go here. Less updating on other sites for me.
http://redscull.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=4274

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bump up then lurk

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